EUGENE, Ore. (BN) — A woman was spotted walking out of Nordstrom Rack after purchasing a pink halter top, sources told Brimborion News on Thursday. Dareena Kahl, 24, entered by the southern entrance of the building, but decided to exit through the east doors, in view of the Old Navy next door. That was where she was spotted by 19 year-old Fiona Reeves, who works as a brand associate at the retailer.
“I thought it was her,” Reeves said. “But I couldn’t believe it. She looked so different. Her tattoos were all covered, and she had these drunk soccer mom sunglasses that were totally out of character.”
On her break, Reeves texted her older sister, a close friend of Kahl’s, to describe what she had seen. Later that evening, her sister and a closely-knit group of friends, all self-described “gutterpunks,” decided to hold an intervention for Kahl, which quickly devolved into shouting, name-calling, and even hair pulling.
“F— those c—s,” said a red-faced and sweating Kahl outside, after the meeting. “They think they’re cooler than everybody because they wear the uniform and listen to that kind of music. It doesn’t make you cooler, it makes you an elitist piece of sh–! I’ve seen you cry like a bitch when your daddy told you you couldn’t stay with him and his new wife in Palos Verdes, Tera Lyn! I’ve seen you make up a playlist of all Ed Sheeran on Spotify! Military boots and f—ing neckerchiefs…please! Hey, maybe I hate earth tones, huh? Maybe I like pink! Huh? Maybe I like pink! Maybe I like halter tops! Maybe I wanna get in touch more with my feminine side and stop being so butch! It’s okay to be into only dudes, Tera Lyn! You don’t fight the patriarchy by being bi-sexual, Tera Lyn! We know you do it just to piss off your parents, anyway!”
“Who are you?” said an also-red-faced and sweating woman who answered the door, when interviewed about the incident. “Get the f— away from my house.”
