I know it seems like I’m doomsday picking and preaching these days—that all I want is to talk about the most general and large-scale, worst-case scenario news headlines, and then cynically and half-assedly rattle them in your face like I’m some kind of know-it-all toddler who seems to get his jollies that way. This world… Read more
But after I got inside and put my stuff down, it finally struck me—like a coked-out getaway driver into a crosswalk full of guys dressed like Santa Claus—why Rory had so many girls still “riding his jock,” to quote a phrase he loved to use… Read more
EUGENE, Ore. (BN) — A juvenile goat’s indiscretion led to a woman being unable to go into work this past week, Brimborion News is reporting. Lana Murphy, 25, woke up to find her overalls, which had been left outside all night on a patio chair, covered in vomit. All signs pointed to her pet goat,… Read more
Reading the daily news disgusts me. There, I said it. It’s reached the point of where I feel like I’m living out the abattoir metaphor whenever I do. Which I’m just making up, right now, but hear me out. Do you eat meat? And if you do, do you prepare it yourself—“harvest” it from scratch—or… Read more
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You & Me Both, Man…
